Insanity of Motherhood

Motherhood, marriage, and midlife.


Ten Things I am Not Going to do…Ever

The older I get, the more I realize there are certain things I have no desire for.  People try to convince me, but I am getting stubborn in my older age.  If I do not want to do it, I won’t.

Ten things I am not going to do, ever.  (So don’t bother asking)

1.  Eat cauliflower. 

I hate cauliflower.  It smells funny.  It looks funny.  It tastes terrible.  There are plenty of other vegetables for me to eat.  I am not eating it, period.

2.  Go scuba diving. 

This is something people always try to convince me to do.  I know underwater world is an amazing place, but it would not be if I died.  I do not like breathing through a tube, trapped underwater.  It would kill me to even try.

3.  Travel to space.

I do not like outer space.  It freaks me out.  When they start taking requests for people to travel to space, my husband will be first in line.  I will be at home,  feet comfortably resting on the couch.  A big no to space travel.

4.  Wear a tube top.

I have never worn a tube top.  Given my age and shape of my breasts, I cannot think of reason to put one on.  Straps are a girl’s best friend…and so is a little underwire to lift my ‘girls’ up higher.

5.  Sleep in a tent.

Okay, this might happen someday, but not if I can help it.  I cannot think of anything worse than sleeping in a tent.  The family pressures me all the time, so far I have resisted.

6.  Run a marathon.

I suppose this is something everyone should have on their bucket list, but running a marathon will never be on mine.  I run, but training for a big, long, painful race…no.  Am I missing out?  No, I am not.

7.  Be the mother of girls.

When I was pregnant with my surprise, third baby years ago I was hopeful. Five years have passed and I am a still mother of three boys.  I am not having anymore children, so daughter for me.  No more kids, folks.  I mean it.  I will have to wait for girls, when the grandkids arrive.

8.  Go to a Military Air Show.

Years ago, I used to work at a Naval Air Station.  As an employee of the Navy, I was required to work at the annual air show.  It was hot, loud and horrible.  My husband takes the boys to the air show every year, without me.  Not going back, ever.

9.  Sing in a band.

I would love to sing in a band, but no one else would.  I do not sing well.  I do not hear well.  If I sing badly, I will not be able to hear myself.  Bad combination all around.

10.  Move into another house that needs a lot of home repairs.

This why I created my list.  My husband and I have worked on our new home non-stop for four months.  We have a ton of stuff we still need to do.  Remodeling a home is brutal.  If I move again ( a big IF) it will be to a new retirement community.  I will gladly pay whoever, to do all the home repair stuff.

This is my list.  Do not try to change my mind about any of these things.  They will not happen…ever.

Although…if someone is willing to have a bad singer in their band, I might reconsider.