The older I get the more easily annoyed I become. Few are things more annoying than people asking questions that are none of their business. People don’t mean to be rude. They usually are just curious or want to engage in conversation. I hate to sound like the grumpy, middle-aged woman, but a there are a few questions I will no longer answer so don’t bother to ask.
Five questions to stop asking me
1. Where are you from?
People ask me this because I have a speech impairment and they can’t quite figure out why. They assume I am from some place exotic that they have never heard of, but the reality is I speak the way I hear. I don’t hear all the sounds of the alphabet, so I don’t pronounce them all. When you ask where they are from it distracts from the conversation. If someone wants to share why they speak in a different dialect they will. If they don’t, assume they don’t want to talk about it.
2. Do you know sign language?
Another question referring to my hearing impairment. I don’t know sign language and it’s silly to assume all people who wearing hearing aids know sign language. I’m not a representative for the entire hard-of-hearing community because I wear hearing aids. Not every person whose last name is Gomez knows Spanish. We shouldn’t assume people know things by association.
3. Are you planning to have another baby?
I am turning fifty this year. 50. I don’t know anyone who is pregnant at fifty, do you? This is such a silly question. I suppose I should be flattered that people think I look young enough to have another baby at my old age, but I’m not flattered. I have no plans to have another baby in my life unless it’s grandchild. By the way, I don’t miss having a girl either (another annoying question).
4. Will you adopt another pet?
The answer to this question is no. My sweet dog passed away not long ago and I miss her. But my husband and I made the decision before she died that we wouldn’t have any new pets in our life. We have a snake and fish and when they die they won’t be replaced. People love their pets and find the idea of not having them in their home difficult to grasp. I have enough responsibilities. I don’t want the responsibility of an animal. I have friends and family who have chosen not to have children and my husband and I have chosen no more pets. It’s not happening folks.
5. Have you gone through menopause?
I was asked this question yesterday by someone I hardly knew. I didn’t answer. I supposed she assumed I was because I refused to talk about my hot flashes, weight gain, mood swings, and memory loss. Really? Is this an appropriate question to ask someone you don’t know? Why would I share such a personal thing? By the way, I am premenopausal if you must know. Things are still happening, but not as often. This conversation is officially over.
I’m sure you have questions that bother you when asked. Things like, “Are you pregnant?”, “Have you considered plastic surgery?”, “Do you plan like being married?”, and “Does it bother you that you aren’t as thin as you used to be?” Hopefully, when you are asked these awkward questions you handle them with grace because I no longer do.
As a middle age woman I see it as my right to no longer answer questions that make me uncomfortable. Please keep this in mind when you meet me in person. I will however always answer how old I am. I’m proud of my age and will always answer the question the same way…
I am 49 years old, so don’t mess with me.