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It has been six days since my last blog.  Did you notice?  It wasn’t something I planned.  I couldn’t seem to drum up enthusiasm for a new blog post.  Each day I woke with a brain empty of anything interesting to share.  Since I began my blog 1 1/2 years ago this has never happened.

Years ago I read people should date for 1 1/2 years before getting married.  Apparently this is an adequate amount of time to decide if someone will be a good life partner.  Less than that will not allow enough of life to pass to see if two people are compatible.  Interestingly this is exactly how long my husband and I dated before we got married.  The reason I bring the whole 1 1/2 years thing is because it is how long I have written my blog.  I wonder if my lack of writing interest had to do with how long I have written?

The beginning of anything is always exciting.  Starting my blog was great.  My expectations were low and I had much to learn.  Everytime I sat at the computer to type I was doing something I had never done before…write.  When I look back to my early days of writing I can see my growth.  My confidence has gone up.  I am better at expressing myself.  My messages are better understood and appreciated.  Not to mention I have many more readers.

A friend of mine recently asked, ”You like writing the blog don’t you?”  My answer was yes.  I do like writing the blog.  It is one of the things I am most proud of outside of my children and marriage.  It has transformed me in many positive ways.  But I kind of hoped writing the blog would lead to something else.  I think most bloggers feel this way.  We write about a passionate topic to lead us to the next big thing.  For me the next big thing has not happened.

But what if this is it?  What if writing my blog doesn’t lead to something else?  What if I write my 500 blog posts and that’s it?

I lost my mojo last week.   My inspiration or special spark was gone.  I wasn’t sure if I wanted to even find it again…until today.  I realized I missed writing.  I missed being creative.  I missed having a voice and hearing people’s thoughts about what I wrote.  It’s not time to for me to stop, not yet.  I still have things to write about motherhood, midlife and madness.

I guess 1 1/2 years has passed to let me know I’m staying.  I’m going to keep writing until…who knows when that will be?

What matters is I found my mojo again.  Let’s roll with it.

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