Monthly Archives: August 2011

Wednesday Words of Wisdom – Brain, Child – Magazine

17 Wednesday Aug 2011

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This week for Wednesday, Words of Wisdom I decided to pick a magazine.  It is called, Brain, Child – The Magazine for Thinking Mothers. 

Magazines for mothers, usually focus on five basic things:  how to decorate a house, how to cook amazing meals, how to maintain personal relationships (self, spouse, friends), how to look great, and how to raise fantastic children.  Over and over, magazine after magazine, they all offer the same thing.  But I am happy to say, Brain, Child is different.

I discovered Brain, Child by accident.  About a year ago, I was sitting in the children’s book section of Borders.  My young son was busy running around, as we waited for the store’s story hour to begin.  I decided to browse through the parenting section, located conveniently by the children’s books.  As I glanced through all the topics, a book caught my eye.  It was called, This Is Not How I Thought it Would Be, by Kristin Maschaka.

At that time I was full-blown in the middle of my mid-life something and the book’s title rang true.  I decided to buy the book.  This is Not How I Thought it Would Be,  is part-memoir and part how-to for remodeling motherhood to get the life you want.  Although, the book is not my Wednesday Words of Wisdom choice this week, it is worth reading.

The author of the book, Kristin Maschaka, is the past president and a national spokesperson for Mothers & More.  After I read the book, I briefly joined the Mothers & More organization.  As part of my membership, I  subscibed to Brain, Child.  I canceled my Mother & More membership, but held on the magazine subscription.

Brain, Child focuses on motherhood and parenting issues.  It is called a, “a magazine for thinking mothers.”  The magazine is set up in article format.  There is a brief marketplace section in the back, but no ads.  I do not know when the last time you have read a magazine with out ads, but let me tell you it is terrific.

There is a tremendous variety of topics the magazine covers.  There are fictional stories, informational articles and humourous essays.  Although the magazine is intended for mothers, fathers will like it too.  Several articles are written by men and for men.

Founded by two mothers, with journalism backgrounds, Brain, Child was created to be a  literary magazine.  The high quality articles are what make the magazine great.  I like that I can read an essay or two and get my brain going.   If you love reading, you will enjoy Brain, Child. 

To find out more about Brain, Child contact www.brainchildmag.com.

Enjoy reading!

Dear Facebook

16 Tuesday Aug 2011

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Dear Facebook,

It has been two years since we met and I thought it was time to talk.

I became friends with you a couple of years ago, because of my sisters.  They both were your friend and thought you and I would get along.  It was an innocent introduction.  I had no idea what to expect.

At first, I was confused.  I did not know how you and  I were supposed to relate to each other.   I told you all my personal information and started to tell people about you.  It seemed everyone already knew you.  I was surprised how popular you were.

When we first met, you did all the talking.  I would simply login and read all the conversations you were having with people.  I was amazed how everyone would share such personal things with you: thoughts, photos, ideas, even prayers.  I wondered if you and I could ever have that kind of relationship.

After a while, I began to realize how hip you were.  Friends from all over the world started to be in contact with me, through you.  I started to hear from old college buddies, former bosses, distant relatives, roommates, and work friends.  The list of people you knew was endless.  I was so impressed.

I cannot tell you the glee I felt in our early relationship days.  Everyday for months I was in touch with someone who had been gone from my life.  It was like Christmas.  New surprises and rekindled friendships.  It was pure bliss.

As my list of Facebook friends grew, so did my confidence is talking to you.  Soon I was posting my happenings, photos and ideas.  I started to ‘like’ things you recommended for me.  I became involved in other people’s lives, by reading what they had to say.

After a while, I began to realize I was becoming addicted to you.  Daily visits to chat with you, became hourly.  I looked for approval by searching for the little red light at the top of the screen.  I started searching for more people to become friends with.  Some people I hardly knew.

I started to feel smug and began posting my opinions about life.  Soon my postings became rants, telling people how I thought things should be.  There were words, harsh words and some down times.   My ego got the best of me.

But then I wised up and realized you were meant for fun.  Being friends with you could bring real joy to my life.  I began to listen to what my friends were posting.  I gave positive feedback, added humor and became involved.  The more I commented on other people’s lives, the more they commented on mine.

It felt good.  I was lonely sometimes, home alone with the kids.  Because of you I became part of other people’s lives.  Even the ones who were very far away.  It made me happy.

My writing skills began to improve and my inner goofiness was released.  Because of you, I gained confidence.  I gained so much confidence that I signed up for school and started a blog.  Your friends told me I could do it and they were right.

I just wanted to say thank you, Facebook.  I know a lot of people do not like you.  But many of us do.  You have given me a voice in the world.  But most of all, you have made me realize what life is really about…connections, family and friendships.

So that is all I wanted to say.  I don’t know if you and I will always be as close, as we are today.  Things could change and I may be too busy in the future to say hello.    Daily chats may not be possible.  But no matter what I want to know, I am glad we met.  And I will always ‘like’ you.

Lazy Cook – Asparagus Soup

14 Sunday Aug 2011

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Asparagus is a springtime vegetable, but I came across a bunch on sale in the middle of summer.  I thought it would be a great choice for this weeks lazy cook blog.  I make this easy soup all the time, but usually only for my husband and I.  The recipe comes from my cookbook, Vegetarian Meals for People-on-the-Go, by Vimala Rodgers.

Asparagus Soup

Ingredients

1/4 cup leeks chopped (or green onions)

2 Tablespoons butter (or butter substitute)

4 cups vegetable broth

2 pounds fresh asparagus

3 red potatoes (with skins), chopped

4 ribs celery, chopped

1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1/4 fresh ground pepper

Directions

1.  Snap off end of asparagus stalks and discard.   Break remaining stalks into smaller pieces.

2. In a large pot,  sauté leeks in butter until soft.

3.  Put all ingredients in the large pot and cook over medium heat until tender, about 10-15 minutes.

4.  Puree at soup in blender.

5.  Stir well and serve.

If you have never done a purée of hot soup, be careful.  The heat causes the soup spatter very easily and you could get burned.  Puree the soup small batches at a time, just to be safe.  I sound like a Mom right?

Always good to know you are reading, even if it is the lazy cook blog.  Thinking of you all the time.

Have a fantastic week.  Talk to you soon friends.

Freak Out

14 Sunday Aug 2011

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“Ok. Ok. I’m going to freak out right now.” Johnny Depp

Well, it has been a tough day.  I am exhausted.  Today has been the worst case of ‘freaking out’ I have had in a long time.  What has caused me to lose my sanity today?  We went to the mobile phone shop.

Today is my oldest son’s birthday.  Happy birthday Old Boy!  We agreed, today was the day my son would get a cell phone.  I have been fighting the battle phones for two very long years.  Today Old Boy won.  Not only did Old Boy win, but so did Tall Boy and my husband.  Everyone got new cell phones.

My husband has been discussing getting the boys cell phones for a long time.  I have been ignoring him.  I hate the idea of the boys having their own phones.  It freaks me out.

I woke up today stressed out, because I knew we were heading to get the phones.  My oldest son has an Ipod.  He is obsessed with that thing.  We do not have a gaming system at home.  So he goes on the Ipod when ever he can, mainly to play the games.  It drives me insane.  He is a really good kid, watches almost no TV, but he tries to play that thing all the time.

The big boys are thrilled…and I mean thrilled.  This is the biggest thing that has ever happened for them.  My husband thought he and I should get new phones too.  We got Droids.  It does not look like a phone.  I miss my old phone.  My husband is so happy.  I am not.  Everyone is buzzing around the house talking about all the cool things the new phones do.  I am moping.

Sure having a smart phone can be fun, but I do not want to have a family where everyone is talking on the phone to other people, but not amongst each other.  That would be my worst nightmare.

My husband reminded me how I did not like getting my first cell phone.  Now I want the old girl (all phones are girls) to come back.  The funny thing is, this new phone stuff is really my fault.  When I went to the blogging convention recently, I noticed everyone had a smart phone.  I called my husband and told him, “I need a smart phone.  I look like a dork with my old-fashioned phone.”

Now I feel bad to have ever insulted my sweet old phone.

I am returning the smart phone.  It’s not me.  Not that I am not smart mind you. but I need something without all the bells and whistles.  Something that actually looks like a my old friend.

I wasn’t meant to live in this era.  I am not a techno-gadget kind of girl.  I do not want to read books on a computer screen or receive birthday cards through email.  I like hearing someone’s voice, not getting little messages in my phone.

Maybe I will feel better in a few days.  The shock of the new situation will wear off and I will realize how fabulous it is to have a family of mobile phone users.

Uh huh.  I think I better practice up on my breathing skills to stay calm.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  It is going to be a rough ride.

Happy Ever After

12 Friday Aug 2011

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“We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather recognizing and appreciating what we do.” – Frederick Keonig

A few days ago, I talked with a friend of mine.  I phoned her with a business question and we ended up talking about happiness.  It was an interesting conversation.

My friend told me she is switching to a new career.  She wants to do something completely different,  something that would have more personal meaning.

As she spoke about her life and career, she mentioned a book she hopes to read.  Maybe you have read it yourself.  It is called, The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.  It is a part-memoir and part self-help book about a woman who dedicated a year of her life to happiness.  She called her yearlong quest The Happiness Project. Each month she made a new resolution toward her goal of happiness.

My friend has not read the book yet, but is very interested.  She is also interested in starting a Happiness Project group.  The Happiness Project group is people who come together to work on a yearlong project toward happiness.

While I was talking to her, she mentioned that I would be a great person to start-up a Happiness Project group.  We went from talking about business, to discussing how I should become a group leader.  As you can imagine, I was caught off guard by her suggestion.  Me, a happiness leader?  I can tell you, this thought has never entered my mind.

I am considering reading the book, but the group leader stuff is something I will need to think about.  I do not consider myself an expert on happiness.  I am like most people.  Some days I am very happy and others I am not.  How would I possibly lead people toward happiness on my down days?

My friend explained that being happy all the time is not necessary to be a Happiness Project leader.   What is needed is someone who can effectively communicate with people in an honest, welcoming manner.  She felt that is what I could offer.  It was a flattering thing to hear.

The problem is I am not sure happiness should be a goal.  I mean, is it really possible to become a happier person if you set your mind to it?  And if I do want to be happy, can following someone else’s suggestions for a year-long quest bring it to me?

I do not think we are supposed to happy all the time.  It is not human nature.  Unhappiness can be a very motivating force.  Without times of sadness, disappointment and anger we would not fully understand what would make us happy.

What I do believe is that we can make our lives more meaningful.  Having a life that contributes to the world, is a positive way, may be the best way to be happier.  One of the common threads of my friends in midlife, is they want the second half of their life to make a contribution.  Feeling we are ”making a difference’, is very rewarding and does make one happy.

I thanked my friend for thinking I am someone who could lead others.  I am a happy person.  I whine and moan a bit too much, but overall I am happy.  But as for me leading others toward a life of happiness, maybe not.  I have too much mom stuff in me.  I tend to think I know what is best, when it comes to other people’s lives.

But what I will do is read the book.  It can’t hurt right?  I, like many people, am still searching for the next big thing.  Maybe being happier,  can be a goal like losing weight.  Or maybe, happiness is a side effect of appreciating what we already have.

Wednesday Words of Wisdom – The Junkyard Wonders

10 Wednesday Aug 2011

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“Welcome to the junkyard.  I am your teacher, Mrs. Peterson.” – Patricia Polacco, The Junkyard Wonders

Children’s books are often a great source of information.  But sometimes they can also be very inspiring.  Today’s Wednesday Words of Wisdom, Junkyard Wonders by Patricia Polacco is wonderful book full of insight.

I first came across Junkyard Wonders last year when I won the book at an auction.  I was drawn to its wonderful illustrations, but it is the clever storytelling that won me over.  The story is based upon a real lived event in the author’s childhood.

The book is about a girl, named Trisha, who enrolls in a new school.  Her new class is known as the “junkyard”.  It is a special class for an oddly brilliant group of misfit kids, who the other children in school call the junkyard kids.

The “junkyard” class is taught by the quirky and inspiring, Mrs. Peterson.  She is an amazing teacher who brings out the unique talent of each of her students.  Mrs. Peterson helps the junkyard kids to realize being ‘regular’ does not make you smarter or better.

There are so many great things about this book.  First, the wonderful illustrations.  Ms. Polacco is a gifted illustrator and makes her characters come to life with her drawings.  The story is one of acceptance.  It also reminds us that everyone has a unique talent or gift.  It is up to us to find out what it is.

The first time I read this story I was moved to tears.  It is a story of loss, but also one of hope.  I have read this to my four-year old, but due to its sad nature, it may be a better choice for the school age child.

Ms. Polacco has written several wonderful children’s books.  Two of my other favorites are Thundercake and Our Mother’s House.  Thundercake is cute story about how a grandmother helps her granddaughter conquer her fear of thunderstorms.  Our Mother’s House is a fantastic book about a family with two moms and no dad.  It beautifully explains what it is like to have a different kind of family.

If you are interested in The Junkyard Wonders or any other of Ms. Polacco’s books I recommend you visit her website at www.patriciapolacco.com .

Enjoy!

Time to Change

09 Tuesday Aug 2011

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When it’s time to change, then its time to change
Don’t fight the tide, come  along for the ride, don’t you see
When it’s time to change, you’ve got to  rearrange
who you are into what you’re gonna be.
Sha na na na, na na na na  na, sha na na na na
Sha na na na, na na na na na, sha na na na na - Brady Bunch, Time to Change lyrics

My boys are growing up.  I would be sad, if not for the fact they are going through puberty.  Puberty in boys is quite a process.   In order to cope, I decided it was time to read up on the topic.

I consulted Dr. Paul to check out the latest information about boys and puberty.  Dr. Paul is a website.  Dr. Paul is a real doctor and he has a website: www.drpaul.com.  Let’s see what the good doctor has to say.

Puberty in boys usually begins at age 11.  However, the normal range is 9 – 14 years.  As I type this, I am being carefull to make sure my teenagers are not around.  If they catch me writing about puberty, my career as a mom may be over.

Here is a list of changes a boy experiences, as he goes through puberty.

Enlargement of male parts

The website uses the anatomically correct terms, not male parts.  But every time I started to type the correct terms, I laughed. Okay, this means male parts get larger.  I do not want to talk about this, but will say…it is true.

Voice change

The larynx (vocal cords) grow resulting in a deeper voice.  This change happened gradually for my oldest son, but overnight for the middle son.  When I phone home, I have no idea which boy I am speaking to.  Their big man voices sound the same.

 Wet Dreams

This is a nocturnal emission.  This fact of puberty makes the boys responsible for changing their own sheets and picking up their own laundry off the floor.  I do not want to ever take a chance of…well, you know.

Involuntary Erections

My husband explains, the boys should wear longer shirts or carry a coat with them at all time.  Something unexpected may pop up  and it is best to be prepared.

Skin

Oil and sweat glands increase production and grow larger.  Boys sweat more and get greasy.  No wonder it is hard to maintain self-esteem.

Body Size

Growth usually occurs two years after the beginning of puberty.  Growth refers to all the body parts.  Generally, the hands, feet arms and legs grow, then they gain the height.  Both older boys are now tall, but for a while they looked like Great Dane puppies.  Big feet and little bodies.

Hair

For boys, this is a very important part of growing up.  Having a body covered with lots of manly hair is a good.  It is what separates the men from the boys.  Hairless = weak, boylike.  Hairy = strong, manly.  My husband, who is part Neanderthal, is our in-house hair expert.

Had enough about puberty for one day?  I sure have.  Learning more, does not make the process easier.  I guess I will have to hang tough and deal this phase of parenting.  Unless, I have any volunteers to take the older boys for a while.  Any takers?

I Don’t Know, All Right?

08 Monday Aug 2011

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“The decisions you make about your work life are especially important, since most people spend more of their waking lives working than doing anything else. Your choices will affect, not only yourself and those closest to you, but in some way the whole world.”  -  Laurence G. Boldt

There comes a time in your life when you realize, this may be it. I have come to conclusion that I may stay the person I am, doing exactly what I am doing.  Yup.  Me, home with kids, and writing a blog.

I cannot keep explaining to people what I do for a living.  I have been doing it for too long.  For some reason people do not get it.  I am a full-time parent.  My job is take care of the family, home and pets.  That is it.  I do not have another job.  I do not have immediate plans to work outside the home.

The older my kids get, the more questions about the next thing in my life.  Now that the boys are some what independent, it must seem silly for me to sit around the house all day with them.  I do not sit.  The only time I sit is to write my blog and eat.  I do not watch TV.  I simply do all the things one must do to care for a family.

Recently at my son’s birthday party, I was confronted with questions about what I was going to do with my life.

“So, are you back at work yet?” – Party Mom

“No.  I am still at home taking care of the boys full-time.” – Me

“Oh.  Well, do you have plans to go back to work soon?” – Party Mom

“Um…I guess so.  But not for a while.  I want to wait till the little guy heads to kindergarten, before I work outside the home.” – Me

“But you do plan to work someday, don’t you? – Party Mom

“Of course I do.  But  I need to get the boys settled first.” – Me

The moment I uttered the words about returning to work, I knew I was in trouble.  I had no idea what I meant when I said, ‘get the boys settled’.  What does that even mean?  The boys are settled.  Am I using them as an excuse for not jump starting a new career?

The truth is I don’t know what is next.  For some reason I have taken the phrase, ‘live in the moment’, to a new extreme.  I am trying lots of new things, but do I have a plan? No.  It used to make me nuts, now it just makes other people nuts.  Friends, family and acquaintances just cannot seem to grasp that I don’t know what is next for me.

“So you are finishing up school next year right?  Are you planning to teach or become a Director again?” – Friend.

“I do not know yet.  I am waiting to see what happens.  I am not sure about working in Early Childhood Education.  I may want to do something different.” – Me

“Something else?  Like what?  Why are you going to school to become an educator, if you are not going to teach? - Friend

“I want to be up to date on my education skills.   I feel I must do something, but I do not have an idea of what?  Not yet.” – Me

My poor friend.  She seemed genuinely confused.  She is a very successful career person and a mom.  I know she has never once not had a plan for her career and her family.  She knows where she is going and always gets there.  The thought of me wandering aimlessly without any type of concrete plan is hard for her to grasp.

Don’t get me wrong.   I value the work I do caring for my boys.  I am not looking for anyone to compliment me on my parenting or commend me for my choice to care for the kids full-time.  My choice to be with the boys, is my choice.  I am happy with it.  Maybe a little too happy, according to some people.

“Does you husband want you to go back to work?’ – Mom of a friend

“I am sure he would like it at some point, but he does not pressure me.” – Me

“He must make a lot of money, so you don’t need to worry about things financially.” – Mom of a friend

“No.  I mean, he does have a good job, but we do worry about things financially.  We struggle like other families struggle.” – Me

“Then why aren’t you working?” – Mom of a friend.

“I DON’T KNOW, ALL RIGHT!” – Me

Well, I blew it.  Or what I should say is I blew up.  I just could not take it anymore.  My friend’s mom looked at me very bewildered.  I apologized to her.  I am sure she is convinced staying home with the kids is making me nuts.   Being home all day with the boys does made me crazy, but it is the questions of who I will be next I find hard.

Maybe I will find something else to call a new ‘career’.  But what if I don’t?  Will it be okay?  When the little guy heads out to school full-time the pressure will be on.  More and more people will ask, “What do you doing for a living?”  I may not have an answer.  But if I do, you’ll be the first to know.

Lazy Cook – Summer Fizzies

07 Sunday Aug 2011

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Looking through Sunset Magazine, I came across a drink for the lazy cook blog.   The problem was the recipe suggests to peel, cut and purée a melon. It was too much work.  So I improvised.  I substituted the purée melon with mango nectar and created a magnificent drink.   See for yourself.

By the way, Sunset, made the drink without alcohol.  But add a little vodka, and you have fruity cocktail.

Summer Frizzies

Ingredients

Mango nectar (any flavor of nectar will do)

Mineral water or club soda

Vodka (optional)

Directions

1.  Pour juice into clean ice-cube trays.

2.  Freeze until set.

3.  Divide frozen cubes among four glasses.

4.  Pour mineral water over cubes.

5.  Add 1 ounce vodka  (optional).

This lovely drink was served with our favorite take out dinner.  Lazy all around.

So glad to know you are with me friends.  Talk again soon.

Blog World

07 Sunday Aug 2011

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Lost in blog world yesterday.  I attended my first ever blog convention.

The convention was for female bloggers.  Over 3, 000 women from around the US gathered together to gain insight, improve skills, but most of all to network with other bloggers.  The group attendees were very diverse.  Every type of blogger imaginable was there.

I did not really learn anything, but the food was good.  My kitchen table is covered with tons of free junk, given to us from the sponsors.  The highlight of the day was when we heard a motivational talk from the current CEO of Pepsi, Indra Nooyi.

Frankly, conventions are best for making connections.  They offer people of similar interests, a chance to get together and talk.  The fellow bloggers I met are what I will remember most.  I was fortunate to hook up with a few experienced bloggers, who had great tips.  I hope to try a few new things in the weeks to come.

Still not exactly sure where the blogging path leads, but it isn’t doing me any harm.  As a matter of fact, blogging is starting to grow on me.  I think I may stick with this gig for  a while.

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